Best Friends
by xiphoidwood
Summary: Two boys, Stan and Kyle, have been friends forever but now Kyle is feeling differently. He is in love with Stan and has made up his mind to tell him so.
1. Chapter 1

**Ch 1**

The cold whisked around my face and nipped at my nose. Though it was colder than it has ever been, I barely noticed. My mind thought of one person; one boy. His hair was dark, black as coal. Blue eyes pierced my heart leaving a wondrous sensation behind for me to have. That skin of his, almost porcelain. Deep within me the urge to brush my fingertips on his baby textured skin grew and festered inside of me. Some call it a monster.

Gay. Is that what I am? I chewed the word inside my mouth but it sounded so wrong. Gay is tan, muscled, dyed, and fake. I am pale, lanky, red haired, and could care less about fashion. The more I try and think about me with someone else my mind races to him. My best friend. My soul mate?

Stan Marsh. He is nine years old. I am three-quarters of an inch taller than him, but he's a few months older. We've been friends since forever and this love feels so right. At least I think I should call it love. Yet day after day I fight it off. Never daring to whisper the words I think in my head in fear that they will carry off to unworthy ears.

Today is the day. I wrote a note that I will leave in his room, on his cream coloured dresser filled with his everyday clothes, that he will soon read and either share my feelings or outcast me, forever ruining our friendship. As I think about it I grow paranoid. I imagine him picking up the note once I'm gone and adapt a disgusted face. Then he will call me, ask me never to talk to him, and then hang up. I stop, snow falling on my green hat that covers my ginger corkscrew locks of hair. While spinning around I think of going home and burning the note, never thinking of it again.

No. I told myself at the beginning of this adventure I'd face the consciousness that follows my plan if it doesn't end up pleasantly. I twirl on the heels of my shoes and accumulate a brisk walking pace, a bit faster than before.

The note is inside my pocket, but I still occasionally reached my mitten covered hand in to make sure. I was so close to Stan's house my heart started pounding.

I pulled a green glove off of my soon to be freezing hand with my teeth and knocked on the door. Anticipation created an explosion of butterflies in my stomach. Now that sounded gay. Seconds went by and I thought he might not be home. I played with the idea in my mind that I could put the note in his mailbox, leaving the risk of someone else finding it.

As soon as I decided to go home, with the note, the door opened.

"What dude?" Stan said in a tone that made me melt. Gay, gay, gay.

"Wanna hang out? Fat ass has got the flu and Kenny's thinking of going down to Raisin's and try to pick up a girl. I was thinking a movie with popcorn?" the words slipped out faster than necessary which was mostly because of the nerves.

"Uh. I kinda have Wendy over. Sorry man." He then closed the door leaving me quite disappointed. I came here for a reason though and knocked again.

"What?" he asked, irritated. In response I handed him the note and turned around to start walking, sporting a red blush all across my face. Not exactly how I planned it in my mind but I felt a burden leave me.

Moments pass as the shock settled in and I soon head in the direction of home. Although I'd rather it not be, my mind is on Wendy. Jealousy suffocates all of the other senses in my body and focuses on the dismay in my life. How I wish Stan would think of me like he thinks of Wendy. I don't expect a flower and a date, I mean we're only nine, but the knowledge that he too shares the strange feelings that accumulate whilst together.

Home seems so lonely. Dad must be off working a case and Ike out with Mom somewhere that I have no time to think about. I sulk around in my room for an hour or two, flipping through channels on the TV not really in the mood for entertainment, and wait for something to do.

How I hate Wendy. She takes up Stan's time and I end up in my room, bored out of my wits. They could be holding hands or worse kissing. She thinks she's smart but I've seen the grades of students when I helped the teacher grade papers and she only averages a B. Not that it matters to Stan but if it did I'm sure I'd be there holding hands with him instead of that girl.

A knock on the door interrupted my thoughts and at first I thought I imagined it. Another pair of knocks follow it and I am forced to get the door.

Stan is standing awkwardly, and I irrationally feel superior as he looked at mr with those blue ocean eyes of this screaming forgiveness. I barely have time to step back and ask him if he wants to come in when he jumps up onto me and holds me. I stumble backwards and land on the carpet in the living room. A moment goes by where we just stare at each other, not just into out eyes but into our mind and soul.

It's weird how small moments make bigger impacts than longer ones. I can't remember a single thing from first grade but that moment on the carpet is something I'm going to carry with me forever. My mystified expression reflected off his endlessly beautiful eyes as questions bubbled in my mind.

"Why are you here?" I force the words out. It is hard to breath with all of Stan's weight on top of me.

"Because I think there is a possibility I might like you like you. After reading that note I couldn't even look at Wendy anymore. Truthfully I've felt this way about you for a while but my dad talks about gay people as something bad. I'm not sure I care what he thinks anymore though." he smiles and hugs me tightly as if I might slip away. I hug him back and bravely kiss his cheekbone at which in time we both blush and decide to get off the floor.

Again we stare, our hands find there way to each other and we sit on the couch, happy as can be.


	2. Chapter 2

**Ch 2**

My whole body shook with rage. My own son, gay. His sexual preference being pinpointed to those with junk. It wasn't natural, and even if I didn't go to church every Sunday or maybe felt up a random skank from the local bar every once in a while I'm still Christian, and in the bible it states gays are fucking bad.

Maybe if we lived somewhere else, somewhere other than this small obtrusive town, I wouldn't react this way. I had my questions also about my sexuality when I was younger but that got cleared up after having sex with a chick. That's it! I walked to the bedroom where Sharon lay, reading some chick story.

" Hunny! We need to hire a prostitute!" I said, proud of my epiphany.

" What? What the hell are you talking about?" she asked, a mix of horror and frustration in her expression.

" Stan. He said he's gay. We need to prove otherwise," I stated broad as day, a slight pant in my voice. No son of mine will be a filthy faggot.

" No Randy. Stan is just going through an awkward stage. It no wonder he is feeling this way since his only male role model in his house is completely mad who thinks prostitutes are okay for nine year old boys!" Sharon said crossly.

" Shaarrron," I droned on, "please!"

" NO! End of discussion mister!" she said while slamming her book on the bed side table in anger.

" Fine," I lied. I went off to find myself a prostitute. Sharon would never find out either. I rushed over to the Brofloski's house to find Gerald.

It took a couple of minutes by car and I ran to the door once I stopped the car. I barged in for dramatic effect.

Sheila shrieked in shock. Ike and Kyle were also startled. I noticed Kyle's scared timid eyes as if I was there to drag him out and kill him. I ignored his grieving look towards me and asked for Gerald.

" In...his room. Why didn't you knock?" Sheila asked, narrowing her eye. She never liked me

" Does that matter?" I smiled and ran to his room.

"You're coming with me!" I wheezed and grabbed his wrist. He was originally on the web, most likely working on his lawyer business.

"Where are we going?" he asked, no surprise in his voice at all. I come over all the time with some interesting adventure in store. Most of the time I try to not let my kids find out.

"We're off to find a prostitute for our boys," I said as we rushed out the door and into the car.

"Why?"

"Because they think they're gay. We need to show them they are being childish and that they aren't!"

"How 'bout I go back inside and finish paying my bills"

"How 'bout we go find a prostitute for our pre-gay sons!"

"Truthfully Randy, I am okay with Kyle being gay. I'm not going to try to change his mind. Of course I'd rather him be fucking some cunt over a man's ass but that's his decision." Gerald preached.

"What? Is that your inner-jew talking or what? I'm not sure if you heard me, our sons think they're gay. G.A.Y gay."

He sighed and got out of the car. "Randy, leave them alone. They're either gay or just experimenting. Let it go."

I sat there stunned. What? No, he was wrong. I will get Stan a prostitute and he will be straight. Only one place to go, Mexico.

"Kyle, my dad hates me." Tears streaming down his beautiful face as he cried out to me.

"N-no he doesn't. I mean, of course not!" I murmured, feeling plain awkward in this position. I held Stan anyway and he cried on my shoulder. Not knowing what to do next I stroked his hair, throwing his hat on the floor.

He kissed me on the cheek and it felt wet and slobbery. I wasn't sure if it was because he was crying or if it was his tongue. I kissed him back but venturing to his lips, in hopes to make him stop crying. We stayed like that for a few minutes until he brought his hand down to my stomach. It was so close to my navel that I jumped in shock.

"I-I'm sorry!" he stuttered, his face flushed with pigment.

"No, it's okay. I was just" I stopped to think of a good word to use, "surprised."

"Oh. Do you want to, you know, continue?" His face was so cute it was hard to get any word out. All these feelings were now more confusing than before we came out. While hiding my feelings it was so easy to talk to him. Now I always trip over my words and blush at awkward moments. I just wish we could be both friends and date.

"If you want," I answered, sporting a blush myself. Maybe nine is too young to do this. Sex is something to do when you're in high school, not now when we're still figuring out how to-

I moaned softly as his hand reached down and touched my member gently. He roughly pushed me onto my bed and continued to play with it. It felt so good, yet I knew it wasn't right. Not now at least. We needed to think about this more before going to this extreme.

"I changed my mind." The words were heavy in my mouth and shame stamped it's presence all over me. I felt horrible and little. Stan was in a time where he needed closure and I was too selfish to give it to him. I held his hand and took it out of my unbuttoned pants.

After I zipped them up I glanced at his face. He showed signs of hurt but was calm all the same.

"You're right, too soon," he said in a glazed voice. I tried to hug him but he turned away. Now I felt hurt. I touched his hand and he jerked it away. Maybe I should go.

"I'll just go home then. I guess," I said with disappointment.

He nodded and I walked out the door. Sharon smiled at me as I left and I waved unenthusiastically. I couldn't help but tear up. All of these feelings were foreign to me and I'm not sure I know how to control them. I shouldn't be upset because I was the one to say no. He should be more sad than I am, and well he probably is. I just don't understand why I'm upset.

Before I could straighten anything out in my head I reached home. Mom was sitting on the couch with Dad and she was rambling on to him about something. I heard Stan's name and his dad's name in there somewhere but didn't stick around to find out why. I went up to my room to lay down and vent.

My dad had just gotten home from a three day geologist meet in Denver and he had with him a strange lady. I was doing my homework which consisted of reading a book of my choice, doing twenty multiplication problems, and study for the science quiz for Monday. I was on my fifth problem in math when he barged in.

"Stan! I have fixed your problem. I have brought you a prostitute," he set forth.

"Dad, I don't want a prostitute! I'm fine with Kyle! Leave me alone so I can do my homework so I won't have to have detention again so I can go over to Kyle's house to play xbox!"

"You will listen to your father when he tells you to have sex with prostitutes! No son of mine will be gay. Now go to your room with this lady and prove to yourself that you aren't gay!"

"One, I'm already in my room. Two, prostitutes are illegal. Three, fuck you dad I'm gay."

"That's it! I'm going to Starch's pond and I'm taking the prostitute with me. You can fuck her at the lake if you want, if not I will,"

"Have fun dad,"

"Oh I will, I will," he narrowed his eyes and stormed out my door. The whore followed in her leather shorts and cropped shirt that barely fit her hooters. Kenny would be so mad if he knew I just did that. I chuckled to myself and thought of Kyle.

I may have gone to far, but I won't know unless I ask. I made up my mind to ask him tomorrow if we were still cool. We haven't really talked and it's kinda awkward now. I miss being with him.


	3. Chapter 3

**Ch 3**

"Kyle, I don't wanna do this! I feel stupid!" Stan whined.

"C'mon! It's a perfect way to tell people we're dating. Someone will come up to you and be like 'Hey why are you wearing Kyle's jacket?' and you can be like 'Oh I am attracted to him and want to fuck him in the ass' you know, maybe without the ass part," I said, then we both laughed at the vulgarity of it all. Words like ass and fuck made the situation feel more like the friendship we had before.

Stan and I got on better terms with each other after the penis incidence and have been happy ever since. My mom drove us to the movies twice and we held hands the whole time. Those dates were fun. Being with him makes everything seem better. Stan has plagued my mind in the best of ways. Today we were at my house talking about how to come out to our friends.

"It seems a bit gay," he said gingerly.

"And holding hands and kissing with boys is totally not, right?"

"That's not what I meant Kyle." He laughed even though I didn't understand his point. "It's not the kind of gay I want to be labeled as. You know? It's going to ruin my rep on the football team!" Stan stood there itching his neck where the green cotton rubbed uncomfortably against his sensitive skin. It was a bit tanner than before because the weather was warming up and he is out almost everyday with me or Kenny or someone from the team. Sun freckles sprinkled across his face. Kenny had freckles like that also, but his weren't brush strokes from god, crafted perfectly to make him so much more sexier than before. I liked kissing them.

"Then what are we going to do? Just walk up to them and say 'Hey I'm a fag'. Cartman will die from the hilarity of it all. No, we need a plan," I nagged.

"Okay, as long as we get to try that thing I tried a few weeks ago," he smirked seductively. Heat radiated from everywhere in my body and beads of sweat came from my forehead like rain from angry clouds. Shit, I'm not good at this.

"L-le-lets figure out, um, fig-" I stammered as Stan took off his hat. Next, my jacket. Then his shirt. Pants fell to the ground. Terrance and Philip underwear remained. He stepped a bit closer and I closed my eyes. He kissed me in a way I've never been kissed before, which by the way isn't saying much. I didn't know what to make out of all of this. I really wasn't sure what I was to be doing with my tongue at all.

A part of me longed for those damn underwear to disappear and for him to touch me in places that nine year olds shouldn't touch. Goosebumps formed everywhere his fingers lingered. My arms tingled in enjoyment as he stroked them lightly.

"Stan," I said quietly, not sure if I could utter any louder than that.

"Kyle!" he said enthusiastically and pinned me to my bed. A feeling of panic overtook my body and I pushed him off me as he sucked at my neck.

"My mom could come in!" I gasped.

"You got a lock?"

"Ya but," I was at a lose for words. He tip-toed over to the door and locked it, then ran back over and pounced. I giggled against my own will and smiled as he softly touched his lips against mine, not exactly a kiss but a loving act none the less. What the hell. I wrapped my arms around his neck and licked his nose. My lips found his as we blindly figured out how to do this.

Stan unbuttoned my pants and I let him inch them off. My knobby knees were plain as day. I never liked my knees. Stan's knees are boney, but not protruding or of any knobby like quality. Beautiful.

Cold hands went all over my stomach and my shirt somehow came off. Both of us were left with our underwear and socks. We both stopped, not going any farther, waiting for the other to proceed. Small awkward kisses were passed but nothing else. Stan circled my bellybutton with his tongue then he kissed it.

I grabbed his butt, although I felt stupid doing it.

"Maybe we should google how this is done," I suggested.

"Ya, good idea," Stan said kissing me and putting on his jacket while walking to the computer. My breathing was uneven and my mind scrambled. Was Stan going through the same thing? He seems so calm and he composed himself so well. I was flabbergasted at the least.

I got my jacket and pulled it over my arms even though I wasn't cold. In fact I think I might be sporting a fever. My face was red and hot. Stan woke up my mac and got onto Firefox. He opened up google and started typing :

How to have gay sex

"Um, try the third link down," I suggested, leaning over his shoulder to get a better look. He clicked it and we read.

[Are you ready for sex? Chances are if you're reading this your body is ready to seal the deal. But are you ready emotionally? Have you prepared to top, bottom, or looked into other ways to be intimate like frottage, rimming, or oral?

And these days you can't be too safe or sure a guy is "clean" by the way he looks or from what he says. Given that, have you thought ways to be safe?

Sex may seem simple: give, receive, relieve. But, sex can be far more complication, especially if you're not prepared.

Let's start with emotions

Some guys can be physical without experiencing emotional connections. Others, however, prefer some level of emotional bonding before being intimate. Have you thought about where you lay on the spectrum? More on sex and emotions.

Now, on to preparing to top or bottom

It's obvious how to top or bottom: One person penetrates and the other receives. But, how do you know if you're a top or bottom? And even them, are you a good top or bottom? And, are you prepared to do either?

Do you know how to be safe?

Once you've chosen to have sex, there are a number of ways to reduce the risk of contracting an STD. STD Guide Elizabeth Boskey, Ph.D. says, "First, you need to know yourself. Second, you need to know your partner. And third? You need to know about condoms and safer sex." Track these safer sex tips and ways to avoid getting an STD.

Not into anal?

Despite the common myth, not all gay men like anal sex. There are many ways men can be intimate with one another without having anal sex. Two very common ways are intercrural sex and frottage. Both of these types of non-penetrative sex can be used as foreplay or for complete intimacy. ]

"Gays can get aids?" Stan asked.

"I guess so. That sucks."

"Ya well, so do you understand it better now?" I questioned.

"No. Let's try a different link," and he backspaced to the previous screen with the different sites. Stan clicked on a link stating [Information for Gay Teens on Having Sex for the First Time]

"Maybe this will help. We're not that far off from teens,"

[Oral Sex

Oral sex refers to using your mouth on a partner's genitals.

On a guy this is called fellatio. A lot of people also use slang terms like blow job or giving head.

On a girl it's called cunnilingus. People may also say they "went down" on someone.

There is no one way to have oral sex. So if you are nervous about "doing it right" one of the best things you can do is talk to your partner. Asking what he or she likes, and talking about the situation might seem awkward, but it is really the most likely way to make sure you have a positive experience.

Keep in mind that oral sex can pass STDs. So it is wise to practice safer sex by using a dam for oral sex performed on a girl. Condoms can be used for oral sex performed on a guy.

Anal Sex

Anal sex refers to having sex play involving the anus. Some people have anal intercourse. Others uses toys or fingers anally.

Like oral sex, it is really important to practice safer sex and to use condoms when having anal sex. That's because anal sex can easily pass STDs including HIV.

When it comes to anal sex you should always take your time and stop if anything feels uncomfortable. Plus, it is a good idea to use lube because the anus generally doesn't produce enough of its own to reduce painful friction.]

"Oh. I kinda get it," I said, understanding a bit better.

"Now let's try it," Stan said, holding my hand and coaxing me to bed.


	4. Chapter 4

**Ch 4**

That night, we did not have sex. Right when Stan's peep wiggled it's way to an erect position, guess who came storming in? I will wait so you can make your guess. Think out of the box. It's hard. I bet you won't guess it right.

Butters, the annoying fuck, came barging in. Why? For no reason at all. He ruined the night that I would have remembered forever as the night I bumped uglies with the most amazing guy in the world, my boyfriend, and by extension, my soulmate.

"Butters, what the fuck are you doing here?" Stan growled angrily. Butters was nervous, but I didn't care because I wanted to beat the shit out of him.

"I-I, oh hamburgers," he rubbed his knuckles against each other and looked down at the ground, avoiding visual contact with Stan or me. Thankfuly, when Butters ran in here, we were safely under the sheets and if we positioned ourselves correctly, our penises wouldn't show.

"Eric sent me," Butters finally spat out.

"Why?" I asked, starring him down with a deathly jewish glare.

"Well, you see, well um, he thinks you guys are, umm, well gay. He wanted, oh OH HAMBURGERS!" He starred at Stan's crotch. Soon the part of the blanket near Stan's penis was wet, white, and moist. Stan was so embarrassed (I could just tell) and I wanted to hold him and say it was okay, but I couldn't because that sounded a bit gay for my standards.

"We aren't gay. Get the fuck out Butters!" I yelled as Butters ran out mumbling "oh hamburgers" over and over again.

"Shit," Stan said, his face red as a tomato.

"It's okay," I said, but it wasn't. Cartman will soon know and he will tell everyone before we can, unless...

"Hurry! Get to a phone and call everyone you have the number of and say that we are gay! Do it now!" I said hurriedly.

"W-What?" Stan said, but it soon dawned on his the reason of my actions. I jumped up (with no clothes on) and ran over to my pants and tugged them on. Stan simultaneously ran to his phone on his dresser and fingered the buttons.

"Hey Kenny, Kyle and I are gay. Talk to you later. Tell people!" Stan said in a rushed tone. He then proceeded to hang up and call more people. Tweek, Craig, Token, Clyde, Kevin, and even Jason. All the conversations lasted less than 20 seconds.

"Anyone else?" Stan asked.

"The girls, but they don't need to know,"

"Yeah, I only have Wendy's number anyway and fuck her," he laughed. We felt better.

"Want to continue?" Stan asked.

Truthfully I didn't. I wasn't in the mood anymore. My mind was about to explode with thought. What if everyone excludes us now? I voiced my fear.

"No, our friends are cooler than that. They would not be that big of dicks." Stan comforted.

"I...I don't know," I sighed.

"Don't be such a negative douche," Stan kissed me. I kissed back less enthusiastically.

As I expected, the next day went horribly. Stan and I bravely stood side by side, holding hands, by the bus stop as usual. In my mind I hoped Kenny would come first so he could help us when Cartman verbally rapes us but that did not happen. A couple of minutes after standing in the snow Eric walked up with a wicked smirk on his pudgy face.

"Sooo, what have we hmeare (here)?" Eric said smudgly.

"Shut up fatass," I hissed.

"Yeah, c'mon Cartman, can't you be a halfway nice person this one time?" Stan pleaded.

Cartman pretended to think about it. He exaggerated the motions to the extent where it would be funny in a different situation. I balled my free hand into a fist and stuffed it in my pocket.

"Let me think about it. Okay, I will be the better person and not make fun of you gay, faggot, dick sucking, ass fucking, queers."

"Fuck you," Stan spat

"No thanks, my ass is for shit, not dicks," Eric said, covering his butt and backing away a few inches.

"Whatever," I said and flipped him off. I realised a little too late that I had mittens on and that you can't really tell what I am doing with my hand. The message was still received and Eric glared at me.

Soon after, Kenny came trotting along, smelling of tobacco smoke and rat poison. He doesn't always smell like that, I suspect he isn't allowed to bathe or wash his clothes regularly so he wears dirty clothes sometimes and smells of home.

"Hey fags," Kenny said in a muffled and joking sort of tone. I nodded in recognition.

When I looked over to Stan it looked like he was about to be sick. He stared at the ground with a pink tinted face. I couldn't tell whether it was flush from the weather or the embarrassment, or both.

Later still, the bus came and we all got on. Cartman made sure to stay as far away from us as possible and ended up sitting next to some ugly kid named Jason.

Anything is better than faggots, I thought sinisterly. Stan wouldn't let go of my hand, but I didn't mind. If he let go he might faint from the looks of it. His pink face turned a greenish colour and he teetered back and forth as he walked to his seat. Other children stared at us as if we were some hideous mutated freaks. Maybe we are.

I teed to start up a conversation and pretend everything was normal but my mouth was dry and I couldn't form any words.


End file.
